Nov 29 2009 2:01 pm
Drunken single night stands and safe sex are proxies. It’s better to do it right and spread your seed, running from town to town using a new alias every night. Carcinogenic authenticity is the taste of the moment. Authentic carcinogenicity is good except for all the STDs and cancer. When you’re wasted, dancing to Duran Duran around the Bose feels kind of primitive and important, but really you’re just wasted and look like an idiot. Unless you’re Mary Kate. If you’re Mary Kate you really do tap into something primitive and important, something beautiful and good, something that makes our open fire pork shoulder seem like a cheap facsimile. Maybe we should have shot a neighborhood dog and ate its heart?